Surely You're Joking Mr. Feynman

I have just finished one of the best book written by any geek. Well I am sure about the last word. He is not a geek at all he is a scientist not usual one probably he is one of the greatest scientist of twentieth century. His name is Richard P. Feynman. He is most publicly known scientist in the world. I am talking about “Surely You're Joking Mr. Feynman”, Adventure of a Curious Character. I heard a lot about this book but for some reason I never got it before.

Probably, irrespective of reader this book gives the idea about how far a human being can go. How many things can happen in one life? Those who called life is short probably never heard the name Feynman!!! This is kind of autobiography and he is talking about himself, about his life, about a giant mind. I wander how it becomes possible for a human being to live such a weird life. After reading this book anyone will say this is too much, really too much, probably he was joking. He started from his boyhood. He got tremendous style of writing with colloquial language. You can read the whole book without any break.

He is very good at telling stories. Here he talks about himself. This is a master piece. He tells about himself in such a way that it gives you feel like you could be Feynman if you worked hard a bit more and be more consistent. He is a super genius. I have decided to finish all his books one by one. Let me see how far I can go. But from my point of view everybody should read this book. This book is something special, something very very special.

Here is his official website. Here is Encyclopedia Britannica article about Feynman.

People often think I’m a faker, but I’m usually honest, in a certain way – in such a way that often nobody believes me!

– Dick Feynman

Thirteen Phrases for Living

In my office there is a printer attached with my pc. This is a shared printer. Everyone can print by this printer. We got three building in out office and there is five or six printer distributed in different building. In some cases few of my colleagues choose wrong printer from network rather than nearest and correct them by printing again. So, everyday my printer serves few requests like that. Ok, now come to the point, today I got a paper on the tray with an interesting thing printed on it. The title was Gabriel Garcia Marquez’s Thirteen Phrases for Living. It was so interesting that I kept it with the intention that if anyone asks for this paper I will give it to him otherwise I will keep it to me. So, nobody asked and it is here with me right now. Have a look at these thirteen statements, its cool.

1. I love you not for who you are, but who I am when I’m by your side.
2. No person deserves your tears, and who deserves them won’t make you cry.
3. Just because someone doesn’t love you as you wish, it doesn’t mean you’re not loved with all his/her being.
4. A true friend is the one who holds your hand and touches your heart.
5. The worst way to miss someone is to be seated by his/her side and know you’ll never have him/her.
6. Never stop smiling, not even when you’re sad, someone might fall in love with your smile.
7. You may only be a person in this world, but for someone, you’re the world.
8. Don’t spend time with someone who doesn’t care spending it with you.
9. Maybe God wants you to meet many wrong people before you meet the right one, so when this happens, you’ll be thankful.
10. Don’t cry because it came to an end. Smile because it happened.
11. There will always be people who’ll hurt you, so you need to continue trusting, just be careful.
12. Become a better person and be sure to know who you are before meeting someone new and hoping that person knows who you are.
13. Don’t struggle so much, best things happen when not expected.

Anyway, I feel like these statements are something very fancy to read very encouraging for depressed heart but it is very difficult to think like that or feel like that.

Safari

I have just installed Safari, a web browser by Apple Inc. for windows platform. Actually it was released last year and I didn’t test it previously. Yesterday one of my colleagues suggested me to use Safari for a while. There is nothing special with it except its rendering engine. I feel like it is very good at font rendering. I guess it is pretty good at overall rendering images and texts. I use it today because I was struggling with gmail and firefox. For some reason my gmail was not loading at my firefox. So I used it today. And I feel like it’s a bit faster than other browser. I am not sure about it; just my first impression is like that. I am big fan of firefox. So it’s a bit difficult for me to choose another one. Apart from that I never liked the user interface Apple used in their product. But Apple is famous for their fancy user interface. So probably everyone like their user interface. It is my problem that I can’t like that. Anyway at least you should try if you never tried it before.

Me & My Emotions

I don’t know why it always seems too far away from me. Every time my destiny seems too far away from me no matter how far it really is. I am in my way right now. I thought I will face my VISA interview this month but it seems like I have to wait for next month. All my papers are not ready yet so I have to wait. Now I have decided about few things. Definitely I will choose Oklahoma offer as because right now it seems more lucrative to me.

Mamun is doing well. I thought I will work with him for the rest of the time. At least I have to manage a fixed amount of time for him. So it will not be easy to maintain so many things together. So I have find out what to cut off. Anyway, hope for the best. Life is terrific things t handle.

In last few months I notice one thing that I should have more strength for myself. I should have more mental strength. I know it will evolve over the time but I have to be more careful about this issue. In course of time I feel that few things those make my nervous. I saw my father, one thing that I noticed in his life; he never got anxious about anything. He is such a cool man. When I was arrested by police and police called him that sir you son is now in our custody, he just said ok.

At the time my grandmother died he was reading Quran. He just kept continuing without saying any single word, not even any expression. Sometime I feel like he doesn’t have any emotion at all. When I got admitted at BUET and told him, he said ok, now which department you want to enroll yourself CSE or anything else? Then I got job he told me ok but don’t think of be settled down keep looking. Then I got admitted in different universities for PhD, he says ok and tell me how I can help you in this regard. And all these are emotion less speech! Without any expression!

Why I am not like him? How he manage that much strength? Every time I wonder when I saw him. Emotion! Emotion! Is a pretty bad thing. Human being should have any no emotion. I want to be like him. Emotion less cool old guy!

Life with Mathematics

It is almost one month I am working with Professor Boris Verkhovsky. He is a mathematician. I had very few experience of working with guy like him. He is interesting well at least he seems interesting to me. He works on cryptography more specifically Elliptic Curve Cryptography. The whole thing is mathematics. I was not very bad at mathematics but as soon as I start work with him I feel like I know nothing about mathematics. This is true that I never involved with such rigorous mathematics before in my computer science career. So I was struggling with it at the very beginning, now it becomes more or less comfortable. Still I am struggling with theoretical works. Hopefully it will be alright within couple of months. I know that will not be easier like previous one but I am trying, trying my best to be habituated with these stuffs.

He seems very helpful to me. He taught me all the way. I made myriad of mistakes but he guided me all the way. I was very good at modular arithmetic he taught me the A-B-Cs. Sometimes I wonder why he is so helpful to me at least he can get thousands of students like me. I, Shiblee am not different from others. I am very great full to him for bringing me back at mathematics arena. I start liking mathematics again. I was detached from mathematics for quite a long time. So, it was a great opportunity for me for backing in mathematics again. There was a time when I loved mathematics than anything else. However, things are going pretty fine and I am enjoying.

Escape from Uncertainty

A quick Barisal tour, well not Barisal tour rather we called it cruise. Rassel, Hasib and I the old culprits started from Shadar Ghat yesterday 20:30. Actually we are very much familiar with this type of journey because it was our third journey at the same route. This is not that we like Barisal or something else; we just enjoy the journey very much. Anyway, it was great fun and a complete carefree day after long time.

Life is not going very fine, which is expected. I know very well that I didn’t do any good thing that would make my life smooth. So many uncertainty and if-buts are out there. Yesterday, I felt like its going to an impossible state. I can’t bear it anymore. So, I need an escape: an escape from myself, an escape from reality, an escape from uncertainty. They are also in the same situation as well. Yesterday, at evening we took a spontaneous decision for another Barisal tour. Rassel proposed the name “Escape from Uncertainty”. Hasib was looking for suitable Bengali name and finally he states that the word uncertainty itself is that much worst that if doesn’t have any suitable Bengali synonym.

We had backed from Barisal today at morning. Generally we never stay at Barisal more than two or three hours. Barisal itself is an ugly city possibly one of worst city of Bangladesh but the journey is incomparable. In fact there is nothing special in this journey in ordinary sense but everything becomes special with the essence of moon and water. Vast water has a tremendous effect on human mind and moon is added with it, so what else?

It is so simple. Just go to Sadar Ghat collect your ticket from your favorable yacht and get on it and it will care the rest of the part. Zephyrs with the essence of water will took all you stress. At least you will feel free for a while. You should try; I bet you will not dislike it.

Research Interest

I had to write this to Professor Le Gruenwald to prove my research intention. She suggested me to send a statement of intend relating her research group. This is different from my statement of purpose. However I would like to share it with you.

I am interested to work you because you are working with Data Mining, Information Privacy and Security. Among them mostly I am interested about Data Mining. I have studied couple of your research papers regarding Mine Data Streams on my own interest. Apart from that my undergraduate thesis title was "Data Warehouse: Design and Implementation". I had chosen this topic because I was interested to work on Discovery of Information.

Beside this I have a very strong interest on Distributed Computing too. I had worked on Grid Computing. In my works I had tried to compile the best approaches of using Database Systems or Knowledge Sources in Distributed environment. And now I am working on Flexible Information Discovery in Decentralized Distributed System.

In future I want to work on Discovery of Information from Data Streams in Centralized and Decentralized Distributed Environments. As you are working on the same field I thought you could be the best supervisor to guide me toward my work interest. As I have strong interest and very little experience in this field I want to choose this for my endeavors.

Its Raining Outside

It’s raining outside. Rain is one of those few things that I like most. I am here working on my desk. I am at my office. I am fine with changes because I know this is real life. But every time rain makes me mad. I love to wet in rainfall. Every time I feel like rain will wash out my sin, my grief. Every drop makes me mad. I wanna rain shower but I can’t. I have some responsibilities in my office. And it does not go very well with my designation.

Life is like that when you grow up you have leave lot of beautiful things in return you get responsibilities. Responsibilities for this and that and yuk.. yuk.. yuk.. You will get fame and other things but you lose the most important thing, Joy, the cheerful mind, that never comes back. I had everything but with the passes of time I am losing everything one by one. Anyway, this is called life, real life!!!

Some Guys Have All The Luck

Chorus:
Some guys have all the luck
Some guys have all the pain
Some guys get all the breaks
Some guys do nothing but complain

Alone in a crowd on a bus after work
And Im dreaming
The guy next to me has a girl in his arms
My arms are empty
How does it feel when the girl next to you
Says she loves you
It seem so unfair when theres love everywhere
But theres none for me

(chorus)

Someone to take on a walk by the lake
Lord let it be me
Someone whos shy
Someone wholl cry at sad movies
I know I would die if I ever found out
She was fooling me
Youre just a dream and as real as it seems
I aint that lucky

(chorus)

All of my friends have a ring on their finger
They have someone
Someone to care for them it aint fair
I got no one
The car overheated
I called up and pleaded
Theres help on the way
I called you collect you didnt accept
You had nothing to say

(chorus)

But if you were here with me
Id feel so happy I could cry
You are so dear to me
I just cant let you say goodbye

(Rod Stewart)

Some guys have all the luck
Some guys have all the pain
Some guys get all the breaks
Some guys do nothing but complain... lolz...

Life is pain

I wish if I could cry. I have no tears left for cry. I can take any more pressure. I am at the edge of break down. No strength left for the next step. I am just out of my mind. I don’t know what to do next? I have faced so many problems in each step of my life. I never get anything in ease. I wonder why me? I scream why me? This is only to me or to everybody? What’s wrong with me? Somewhere something is wrong, something is very very wrong. Probably I am not good a faking it, I am not good to deal with life. Am I itself is a big mistake? Life is pain…

Bizarre Ride

Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong. - Murphy's Law

Yesterday, I saw Murphy law in action. Shaon and I started for Mirpur from home at almost 22:00 by a Motorcycle. It was drizzling when we got out from home. We just didn’t care that. Everything was alright until we reach Kamlapur. The rain became intensified by this time. I carried my laptop with me so was afraid that if water leaks in my bag. We were almost wet.

The main disaster starts later. Suddenly Shaon found that the fuel tank is almost empty so he suggested going to any petrol pump. But my pocket was empty too so I wanted to go to ATM booth first. So we reached at Shantinakar and I drew few bucks. But we found pick-up wire stuff of our motorcycle tore down. By this time it was almost 21:00 and the rain was intensified that you can easily add the adjective cats and dogs before it. So we started hunting a motor mechanic shop with very little probability that they will remain open. We had looked for a shop for almost one hour and we realized that the probability went to zero.

So we start thinking what to do next. We had started looking a taxi cab and a rope. Shaon got an idea: he would tie his motor cycle behind the cab and he would sit there to control the bike and cab will move very slowly. After one hour of waiting we found a cab who agreed to tie the bike behind it. Every thing was except at the time of planning Shaon forgot about rain, so he got drenched all the way and our rope which tied the bike with cab. So, in the middle of our bizarre ride it torn out several times and every time we had to look for a new one. It was so weird that everybody at the middle of the road was looking at us strangely at the same time with sympathy and ridicule eyes.

Anyway, at last we reached at Amar Ekushey Hall, Dhaka University. When we reached there it was almost 2:00. I was so tired that I didn’t think about anything else, just went to bed. Today morning I found that I had slept with my soaked dresses. It was a terrible experience. My mobile camera does work well at night so that I could not take any pictures so I can’t share with you. It was a rare scene you will encounter. After that I decide that I will never buy a bike for myself.

Random thoughts

There is an interesting thing in writing, once start moribund writing you can never back. I have written so many moribund articles in my blog. Now-a-days I can’t write anything other than depression. This is obvious that most the part of life is sorrow. Sometime I feel human beings are more comfortable with sorrow than joy and he keep his sorrow in his safety vault. Nobody wants to leave his sorrow he brought up them as his own child. We love to ask what we have got. We forgot we got life, the most valuable things.

I have lived twenty five years of my life. I have so achievements but hardly, I can remember few of them. But I can remember all of sorrows. I embellish my blog with color of my grief, a weird masochism. Probably nothing is colorful without the dye of grief. Sometime I wonder why we are so why we liked to be so. The question reverberates but the answer didn’t come.

Is it possible to satisfy a human being? Probably no, never. Human being born with dissatisfaction and he is more comfortable with it so he doesn’t want to loose it. This is all he has got. We all are in pursuit of anguish. Life is pain, death is pain…

Independence Zeitgeist

One of my cousins is going to start a new company, a software company named “Independence Zeitgeist”. He is also a Computer Science Graduate. He got his new office at Mohakhali (House No – 265, Road No – 19, Mohakhali DOHS, Dhaka 1212). Probably he could start from 6^th May. Initially he is interested about web development and other Enterprise Solutions. Who knows it could be a born of Incorporation? Anyway hope for the best and I wish him every success. I wanna see the rise of another Young Entrepreneur.

Contact Address:
Faisal Mueen Mamun
House No. 265
Road No. 19
Mohakhali DOHS
Dhaka – 1212
Bangladesh.
e-mail: fmmamun(no spam) (at) yahoo (dot) com
cell: +8801714111905

Feel free to contact him (use my reference) for anything - suggestions, helps, ideas and queries.

Well, I am advertising for his company. Yes, right you are. When I started my blog I had decided that I would never use any ad in my blog. Until now I am strict on that apart from few nonprofit ads like Firefox. It is another nonprofit ad at least it doesn’t bring any monetary profit for me. So there is no bad in this.

The only frustrating part of the story is we can’t create our software market yet. Our people are not to buy software. We are so habituated with pirated software that we can’t count what could be the price. So, it is very difficult for any software company to established software here.

And another thing is Off Shoring or Out Sourcing. Out Sourcing or Off Shoring is not software development. It is completely dumb. It will create another Garments Industry in IT Platform. We have to create our own market, we need the expertise to analyze the market and we need the speculators.

Anyway, Hope for the best let see what is waiting for him tomorrow. I hope he will not wobble, hope he will keep going. I wish him best of lucks in arduous journey of business.

How is Life?

I am now busy with lot of stuffs, office, professors, admission and so on. That’s why I became irregular in blogger. I claimed previously, “I only write, when I feel I want to say something”. But I too busy that I can’t manage few times to write. Anyway, now I am at my office and get few times in spare, so I start it. I am enjoying my business and more or less this is fine. The only bad thing is I can’t manage much time for frustration… :( :D Everything is going fine and hopefully I will face embassy this month, so another uncertainty is coming on probably with lot of mental pressure. So, be prepare for disconnected, de-synced posts. Anyway neglecting few disconnected incident everything is smooth and I am very happy now-a-days.

Bangladeshi Software Industry

Yesterday, I went to Shahjalal University of Science & Technology, Sylhet to attend a Career Talk. I never attend on any kind of talk show before not even to listen. Funny thing was, yesterday I was a speaker! The show was all about career plan for newly B.Sc completed students. How to find a better job in competitive market? In other way, how to sell yourself?

I am not a giant in software industry and I don’t want to be. I have very negative view about Bangladeshi Software Industry. Basically my conclusion about other’s software industry is all the way same. As usual in case of Bangladesh it is worst. The top guys are useless and mostly idiot. The real talents never remain in Bangladesh!!!

I have a real life example for this. Probably CSE, BUET’94 is one of the greatest Batches in history of BUET but none of them is here right now. So what few guys from other department like Mechanical and Electrical dominating the market and become the giant but in real life they are shits, complete idiots. Even they know that they are the shits but they pretend to be a (???). This is the most probable case, I will not say that all are same of course there are exceptions but with very low probability.

I heard a story about a PHP guy from BUET Mechanical, a complete idiot (cagoler bacca) who pretend to be in top most guys in PHP. The funny thing was he was claiming himself as a giant in the industry. Mostak, Pappanna, Jewel all are from 94 Batch and this con man claim himself a Giant. I have reached to a conclusion, probably he don’t know what the real computer science is? Anyway, shit happens!!!

However, we were talking about Bangladeshi Software Industry. Bangladeshi Software Industry is based on outsourcing and offshore jobs which does not have much difference from garments industry. There is not much hope with our industry. Lot of reasons are there like market is too small. Among them most are already habituated with pirated software even the government, so not much hope. Still computer is not a necessary part of our life and so on. And the frustrating part is corporate world who could be the potential market has not much trust on our software industry. So they buy their product from other market leaders. Anyway, I don’t see much hope here but surely that doesn’t mean there is not much hope.

I think there is not much challenge in software industry unless you work with cutting edge research products.

And very few company in the world work with that sort of product. The industry is based on mediocre people even they don’t need a real talented guy. And another thing is the total knowledge base is based on business which is very alarming. Basically businessmen know very little except their profit and for the shake of the profit they could bury the total knowledge.