break! break!! break!!!

A had paper due early morning today. It went well and after the submission "she" said I can take a break today! I don't know for some reason it made me laugh. What is a break? What does it mean having a day off? Break! break! break! I want a break, I want a break, I want a break. Day-by-day I am losing my sanity. Everyday I am hope everything going to be good but at the end of the day I am figuring out it is not. It's my life.

I used to tell people I am a loner but in early days of America I realized I am not. It's not easy to be alone, it's not fun to be lonely. Those days I crave for a human being. I don't know why now I feel whose days were good days of my life. I am not sociable person at all, no matter what I can't be sociable. Every things seems boring to me, every things seems useless to me. Every person seems irritating to me. I am going insane!

Couple of days back rassel send me a link, I can't exacly remember the title but it was about need and greed. I don't know why he sent me that but I know I am greedy, I posses a eternal hunger of countless small things. I am not a good man at all. I had all the virtues when I was a kid and I lost one by one in course of my little dumb life. I don't have anything now, I am empty now.

While writing this post I went to the wiki page of seven deadly sin to see what is the rank of the greed on the list. Interestingly it seems like I have six of them except gluttony! Maybe I have the gluttony too, I am not sure. I am a stupid whore. I need a major re-work. I want to go back to my mom, I need to go back to her!