If I miss

If this is the last of your life what are the things you like to do? This is not an easy question, I guess. Unless you have some experience very closer to death you can’t answer this. I think I don’t have such experience, except once I had fallen down from a mountain. At that time I did not get much time to think about this. Now-a-days sometime I think what I would do if I die today. Actually I don’t get many things to do except confession. What does it mean? I know very well that I am not a righteous person but I don’t have so many sins as well.

Well, what are these confessions about? I just want to say sorry to my mom and dad for my deeds and I want to tell them how much I love them. Is there anything else to do? Yes, I want to see pixie for the last time. Anything else? No I guess not. Is there any wish? Yes of course. I want to live a day on my own, only for myself not for anyone else and I want to see the whole world on my own eyes. Is there anything to say to anyone? I guess not. That’s it; pretty simple life.

However, the truth is death will come without any augury so I will not get much time do so. My discontented soul will scream for its desires. Probably this is called life.

The First Cut Is The Deepest

I would have given you all of my heart
But theres someone whos torn it apart
And shes taking almost all that Ive got
But if you want, Ill try to love again
Baby Ill try to love again but I know

The first cut is the deepest, baby I know
The first cut is the deepest
cause when it comes to being lucky shes cursed
When it comes to lovin me shes worse
But when it comes to being loved shes first
Thats how I know

The first cut is the deepest, baby I know
The first cut is the deepest

I still want you by my side
Just to help me dry the tears that Ive cried
Cause Im sure gonna give you a try
And if you want, Ill try to love again
But baby, Ill try to love again, but I know

The first cut is the deepest, baby I know
The first cut is the deepest

cause when it comes to being lucky shes cursed
When it comes to lovin me shes worse
But when it comes to being loved shes first
Thats how I know

The first cut is the deepest, baby I know
The first cut is the deepest

(Cat Stevens/Yusuf Islam, 1967)

escape...

Here is another one from PostSecret. It describes me so well I just can't avoid it. I hope Frank & the sender would not mind for this.

Sunday life

Sunday morning, Sunday brings a complete mundane, lazy day for me. I don’t have anything to do at most Sundays. Well most boring part I have to go to my office because it is not close at Sunday but there is nothing to do. I just go there and sit on my desk, read few blogs, news and articles. The frustrating part is as Sunday is a holiday for rest of the world, nothing happened at Sunday, no big news, no new articles so apparently pretty boring day… :-(

You may think that why it is not close at Sunday? Good question but unfortunately I don’t have that answer. I am not the decision maker so I am not the right guy to ask this question… lolz… Anyway this is not our topic we talked about Sunday. However, Sunday is a motionless, sluggish day for me…

Sunday is the day of the week between Saturday and Monday. In the Judaeo-Christian tradition it is the first day of the week, but from mid-20th century it is often counted as the seventh day of the week. Sunday is named after Sunne (Sól), Germanic goddess of the sun. Christians usually called Sunday the Lord's Day (because they observed it as a weekly memorial of Jesus Christ's resurrection). Sunday has also been called "the Eighth Day" (because of the Roman Catholic belief that Christ's resurrection on the day following the seventh-day Sabbath is a portal to timeless eternity that transcends the seven-day weekly cycle). In most of the Indian Languages, the word for Sunday is Adivar or Ravivar, with Adi (Ah'-Dee) or Ravi being the Sanskrit names for the Sun [wiki].

Random Incident

I become a bit tetchier these days. Another thing I notice, most of the time my reflections are random for the mimic situation. Sometime I feel like I will destroy everything. In my life I always try not to hurt anyone but the irony is most of the people of my surroundings are hurt by me. Probably this is my fate - one of the culprit erroneous parameter along with other twos.

Today I hurt a guy that I never thought. Even I never imagined in my dream that I will hurt her. Anyway shit happens… Nothing big, she just told me Roshik (Jester), I don’t know why it gives me goose bump, I loose my temperament completely, so the obvious repercussions!!! This is the first time… she replied, and I just answered every thing has its own first time… funny… anyway let future handle the rest of the things.

I feel like I need a psychiatrist again. Sometime my rage went out my limit, I just shiver. I am just helpless. I am trying to comeback hopefully I will make it... My life sucks... my life sucks... my life sucks...

Dreamer from Dreamland

I start my blog probably at 2006. But not at that time I never imagine I will write every day. Still I don’t think that I have to write every day, I write when I feel I have something to say to someone to everyone. The thing is this, this happen very frequently now… lolz… Well this is not a big deal. I think human being inherently search for outcome, doesn't it? May be… Then what is the outcome of my blog? probably nothing, probably a lot. The best thing is I have successfully encouraged few of my friends about the blog. I am least bothered about my reader because they are inherently reader, otherwise they will not read my blog because it doesn’t have anything that can make anyone a reader. In the former case I create something in someone’s inside, that’s it. That is the most important thing. Yes of course I expect more reader probably everyone expects more traffic. And it is true that it makes my writings content when I saw that people coming to my blog and read my thoughts but that are not my achievements. Anyway come to the point; I am happy to let you know Rassel Raihan start blogging. No doubt most of my friends are very bright but he has something very special, something very very rare. He is a dreamer from dreamland.

emptiness...

If there is nothing with own nature there can be nothing with other nature, something which is dependent for its existence and nature on something else which has own nature. Furthermore, if there is neither own-nature nor other-nature, there cannot be anything with a true, substantially existent nature. If there is no true existent there cannot be no non-existent (true existent has gone out of existent). Nothing will prevail for those in whom emptiness will not prevail, while everything will prevail for whom emptiness prevails.

Therefore all dharmas (One of the basic, minute elements from which all things are made) are like a dream or magical illusion. There is something there in experience, and one can describe it well in terms of dharmas, so it is wrong to deny these exist; yet they don’t have substantial existence either.
(Nagarjuna)

A God becomes a Man, Jesus…
A Man becomes a God, Gautama…
(If there is nothing with own nature there can be nothing with other nature)

four holy truths

Suffering is inherent in life.
Suffering and repeated lives are caused by craving.
Craving thus suffering can be destroyed.
Eightfold Path is the course leading to these.

Eightfold path is the way to achieve nirvana, these are

Right understanding,
Right thought,
Right speech,
Right action,
Right livelihood,
Right effort,
Right mindfulness, and
Right concentration.

(Buddhism)

Kaauwa Kobi Goshthi

I found a group at facebook today titled “Kaauwa Kobi Goshthi”. I found it as very interesting one. Mostly it is inactive as others in facebook but the profile image is interesting and tag line poem also. Anyway have a look at it…

Random thoughts

I watch two movie in a row “The Shawshank Redemption” and “Papillon”. Both are on the context of prison break. And the theme is same, Hope may be Dream. Does it really mean anything? I don’t know. I had a favorite quote “If you can dream it, then you can make it“. In my office there is a big board for random thoughts and we write our thoughts, dreams. Everything goes there Dreams, Thoughts, Visions, Funs and everything. Long Ago I wrote my favorite quote on that board. Someone reply me “Depends on who is dreaming”. I was full of energy and at that time it was difficult for me absorb it so I came with another reply “If you can’t perceive it then it is not for you”. Anyway that fight continues couple of week.

Dream, dream, dream is good thing unless it hurts you. There are very few dreams that will not hurt you most them hurt you because dreams are dreamed to be broken. Dream keep you going dream makes you depressed dream hurts you most but you should keep on it. You have to dream if you want to be alive, otherwise you are dead. Only dead man can’t dream maybe they can, we don’t know. It is not necessary to bring them all in this fragile planet keep few of them for yourself for your heart where nobody couldn’t see them. Love your dreams, you will love yourself. So keep dreaming… lolz…